Pieces of me

Maybe when we're older

We can lie under the stars
And brew like the red wine we drink
Talk about the studs in the sky
And how we'll someday be among them

Share our favourite stories and everlasting hits
Wonder if we'll be as quiet as our beating hearts are
When there's silence as we pause to wonder
About almost anything

We can sit out in the sun
On the rocking chairs that make my head spin
Sip your favourite kind of hot tea
Study our scars
And the tales behind and between them
Both to cry at and to laugh at
Like the bittersweet almonds we chew

I take out a guitar
And you bring out a book
We finish our tea
But find another good story to share
Along with a reason or two to stay

Or maybe when we're younger

We can laugh till our bones ache
Cry at the complexities
Ponder simplicity

Faster than we can
We fall and forget how to pick ourselves up
Until night falls upon us
And daunt spurs us on

Do the things we've always wanted to do
But only ever strike out less than half the list
Run away from home to find ourselves
Then run back again to see ourselves
Sitting on the front porch

Words unwritten
Backs sore with the weight of the world
On shoulders too young and soft
Tongues tied
Or tied down by different tongues

We fall
As we learn how to fly

And maybe someday, I'll be something more

It was close to 3pm just now and I was thinking if I should go out to town and get my caffeine fix at Epilogue and I simply couldn't decide until I looked out my window and realised it was going to pour. And then there was lightning and thunder and there was no way I was going to stay home alone in a thunderstorm. I'm a chicken when it comes to things like these.

So I grabbed some clothes and my bag and went downstairs and had late lunch- fish fillet curry rice which was not bad + they gave a lot- then I took a train to town.

Prelims are next week ahhhhh. Actually for some reason I'm not that stressed out. Yet. I think I'm too tired to be stressed anymore, even though I sleep real early compared to some of my friends. I turn in at about 11 to 11.30pm every night. I'm a morning person you see.

Anyways, point form because I'm lazy.

1. New favourite song is Sleepwalking by Bring Me The Horizon

2. Just found out Bring Me The Horizon is coming to Singapore October 16th. Hold me while I sob my heart out (because I can't go, not because I can go)

3. Had dinner with wumsy on monday and it was awesome hahaha love her to the moon and back. Ate at Thai Express and I was dying from my tom yum soup since I'm really bad at spicy foods but I managed to finish it!! Yay me! Ate 2 bowls of rice and had ice-cream after that. Both Jiams and I were amazed by my appetite that night. Can't wait till after As so we can stay out longer instead of just having irregular 3-hour meetups on schooldays.

4. As of 29th august, it's 71 days to the end and 90 days to the end. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. I'm so scared to face failure again. I remember when I thought I wouldn't do that badly for Os and then... :( Sigh.

5. For the first time I'm having doubts about what I really want to do with my life. I was always pretty sure I wanted to go to mass comm but suddenly I don't really know anymore. I feel so lost.

6. Today was our last day of school until after prelims. Well, technically that was yesterday since we didn't have lessons today. I'm so happy!!!! No school omg

7. Run out of things to say.

BYE

Shit my shitty life asdfghjkl so mad 

Thnks fr th mmrs

1. Apologise for the lack of updates, been busy with prep for prelims. Big As coming up real soon, it's scary :( 

2. Had a good chat with one of my favourite people just now at Open Plaza. Haha somehow Tania and i always end up there when we decide to meet at tampines for dinner. 

3. Mehhhh don't really know what else to blog about.

4. Expect not-so-frequent updates and more after As because I'll be really busy for the next <100 days. Lots of schoolwork and shiet

5. Nighty nights, love yall xo

Frank says it all. Love this guy so much. 

I'm thinking like if I ever muster the courage to get a tatt, I might just get a real simple one that says 'xofrnk'. Or just something like 'MCR' in big bold letters, idk. 

Then I'll probably get one for my mom too because it'd just feel weird for me to have a tattoo for a band and none for the people who should mean more than anything else to me- my folks of course. 

She's just like him
Spoiled rotten
Confused by the lies she's been fed
And she's searching
For no one 
(But herself)
Her eyes turn to green and she seems to be happy
That she is here
And this time I think you'll know

Pins and needles

mundanemonday. 

Hello from the school canteen.

Wanted to take a selfie but I look horribly cui

Bye hahaha

I'm just a notch in your bedpost, but you're just a line in a song

Gahhhhhh shitload of work to do hahaha. Every day there's like tons of work to do no matter how much I do each day. 

Anyways I've nothing much to blog about actually. In recent, mundane news, I've gotten over my caffeine phase, haven't had tea or coffee in a week woohoo. -pats back-

Also received comments that I've become scrawnier / darker / thinner / taller. Not a good thing. Already more than five feet seven (172cm). At this rate I'll never be able to get married because Singaporean guys are so short HAHA 

Lost 3kg so I'm 49kg now. Actually a lil worried cause I think that means I'm underweight but idk what to do, I already eat healthily. Maybe it's cause I don't really like meat, I prefer veg. 

Ok time to stop procrastinating

BYE

There is more to this I know

1. Wanted to make a Tonight Alive cover but my mom came home :(

2. My Say No To Caffeine Week plan didn't work. The morning after my previous blog post, Lum and Sj and I had Subway for breakfast before school cause it was a late day and Sj said her tea was really good and I tried a sip and ended up having half the cup. 

Lum's face in this omg HAHAHA

Anyways, time for some random photos taken over the course of the past 2 weeks or so

My classmates and I really love tea

So many things wrong with this picture. 

1. The auntie accidentally photobombing

2. Sj using her hand to make a 'flame' but none of us realised it was a vulgar sign then

3. The fork acting as the candle

4. The 'cake' is actually a mousse divika made that ended up being Xinyi's impromptu belated birthday cake

Domino's some random day after school with greedy pigs Lum, Sj and Dom

Noodles me and Tania cooked at her house! It was yumz

Last friday during physics when everyone was pigging out on chips and sweets

Bryan's birthday cake! His bday was on sat and the class celebrated it on friday

Studied at T3's starbucks after sch ended with Lum and Sj

Yummy

Sj came over cause we were going to tamp together later but I had to charge my dying phone first

This was the sinful cup of tea

1. Today marks the start of my Say No To Caffeine Week. Had an overload last week and I fear an impending addiction. 

2. Mundane Monday

3. Was drinking water in GP and the class asshole who happened to be sitting behind me decided to shove me. Mini waterfall. I seriously wanted to scold him but I couldn't resist laughing in the end. Old school pranks never get old. #pununintended

4. So so tired. #butwhatsnew

I'll throw my arms around you darling, and we'll turn to ashes

Pictures from 6th July, saturday. 

Tania invited lianne and i to her parents' condo unit to stayover for a night!! Her family doesn't live there but they own the unit and are going to rent it out soon. So there's water and electricity but no furniture. The condo's at Marymount and it was kinda inaccessible, there weren't a lot of facilities around but we were still really excited cause it's been a long time since we had a stayover together. Plus we planned to buy booze that night HAHA

Running away from home

After a lot of rushing around we went to Bugis for Christine's birthday dinner... One hour late hahaha oops

Nando's! Yummy chicken

Initially it was just 6 of us girls taking a picture then one by one the poly kids crashed it and soon it became like 

Hahaha. 

Was good meeting Christine's poly friends though it actually made me kind of sad (LOL) to see how carefree and fun they seem to be while I'm slogging away in JC. I remember wanting to quit school last year to go to either Lynchua or Christine's course, so it really made me wonder how different I'd be if my parents hadn't stopped me and I'd joined C's course and prolly been on the opposite side of the dinner table that day. Interesting huh

Bought booze from Bishan and went back to the condo. Got pretty drunk haha. At first Lianne and I were drinking more than Tania was, so Tania was chiding us for being 'weak' and all that so we said 'you drink more lah' and she ended up taking home the trophy for most drunk that night. She couldn't even stand straight and she was drunk-texting her friends till 4am hahahaha

Had to get up at 7am bc i promised my dad to go to the fish farm with him. Tania couldn't wake up so only Lianne walked me to the mrt (another piece of evidence of her degree of wastedness the night before). 

It was a wasted day at the farm though cause I just sat at the steps leading to the boat and slept most of the afternoon away. Good thing I didn't drop into the sea. 

Ok homework time sighpie BYE

Oh how she rocks in Keds and tube socks

Great weekend! 

Extremely unproductive though. I'm still recovering from my mini depression over my terrible chem results like i can't believe i got an S when I studied the hardest for chem out of all my subjects. I always feel like the amount of effort I put into my studies is inversely proportional to my results -__- didn't study half as hard for math as I did for chem and I did so much better for that. Annoying ugh chem why do you break my heart. I feel most guilty about all the tuition money though, and the fact that my tutor has to answer to my parents... Must be really embarrassing for him. It's not even his fault, he's a good tutor. 

Maybe it's just me and i have to admit that I'll never be good at chem :(

Ok so i spent yesterday youtubing and adding stuff to my cupboard haha. It's the only thing my mom will let me draw on in my room, if I had my way my walls would be covered in writing and sketches and posters. So my cupboard just looks like a really awkward vandalised piece of furniture in the midst of my otherwise-rather-girly room. 

I have a yellow bedsheet and a pink-purple-red-yellow pillow and a magenta sofa with stuffed toys on top of it. 

Here's the 'added stuff' to my cupboard:

This is one of my all-time favourite songs (lolol pun unintended). You can't see it but the stickers have quotation marks, question marks and other symbols on them too

Jasey Rae lyrics. Love this song so much, words can't express how happy I am to have seen ATL perform it live. Very lucky girl right here

Also, had some good tea at Marina Bay Sands mall (is that what it's called) with my fam this morning yay craving satisfied

Friday afternoon I did a cover of Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus and uploaded it. Haha still thinking whether to publicise my youtube channel but I'm more on the no side since i did that last time and got a lot of nasty anonymous comments. I don't blame the commenters though, I was a much worse singer last time. Can't say I've improved much but oh well I'm doing what I love and that's gd enough

Call me a name, kill me with words, forget about me, it's what I deserve

Sitting here with the laptop blogging, tv on Animal Planet with a packet of soya bean near me... yep this is life.

Meeting Tania around 2.40pm to shop too. Gonna wear something different today, something that's not my usual colour. I don't even remember the last time I wore something that wasn't primarily black/grey/white. Was just thinking about it and I really don't recall. Even the t-shirts I wear to sleep are all those three colours. So yep, gotta make a change in my life man. I'm a terribly sloppy dresser, I always tell myself I'm a pathetic excuse of a girl haha but I can't help it, I'm just incredibly lazy to dress properly for anything. I know I'll most likely regret not dressing up more when I'm much older and I've become flabby and wabby and all, so after As I'm gonna make an effort to look different I pwomise.

Anyway, I'm so so so happy that SA2s are over! Downer that we still have Math Paper 2 and our chem mcq paper, but I'm so taking a break for a while, at least still this amazing long weekend is over. Was really stressed over SA2s, it honestly felt like promos or something. Was also nursing a bad headache two nights ago, before my math paper yesterday, and feeling really shitty because I was so unprepared for the math paper (slacked my entire afternoon away). Fortunately the brand's essence and 8 hours of sleep made me feel loads better when I woke up yesterday morning.

My seat was O25 haha I remember because I was right at the back of the hall and was almost bouncing in my seat around the last 15 minutes of the paper because I was so happy SA2s were over and no one could see me um chio-ing to myself.

Spent the afternoon at town with my girls from 12S16, had a good time :) Finally had some retail therapy! Was super shagged by the end of the day though haha.

Anyways I gotta go now, Masterchef is way too distracting and I have to prepare to meet Tania

BYE

Let's write a song that we can sing to

Jersey just got colder and 

I'll have you know I'm scared to death

That everything that you had said to me

Was just a lie until you left

Now I'm hoping just a little bit stronger

Hold me up just a little bit longer

I'll be fine I swear

I'm just gone beyond repair

A better place

Happily procrastinating when my chem exam is tomorrow

Done with GP and econs! Left with chem tmr, physics day after and math on thurs. 

Go zoey go

Picturez

Had teh si last thurs night at 8pm and ended up sleeping at 3am. Best part was I wasn't even studying i just happily surfed youtube. Found Saosin's lovely piano version of You're Not Alone 

Took this from Shijia's blog. Totally lol-ed haha photobomb at its best

Some random day

Paper bag

How i looked for the entire afternoon yesterday haha this is so unglam don't judge me 

Yepppp

Bye. Hope the next few days pass real quick! Good luck to everyone else who's having exams too!