And these words, they'll convince you

Good day today

Had heats in the morning during pe for sports day I think. Ran 12 x 100 with my class girls and a few other hawk house girls and we got second! Hopefully it's good enough to get us into finals. Was actually quite touched by our class guys who were screaming "S16! S16! GO! RUN!" and my name when I was running haha I could totally hear them the whole way. It was great encouragement

Had break then math then physics lecture and econs was unexpectedly cancelled so we ended at 1pm woohoo.

Did math the whole afternoon at the library and there was a filming at our school so there was a huge spectator crowd when Zoe Tay and Chen Liping came wow I dont even know why mediacorp would choose our school stadium to film a scene haha random much

Then went to meet Tania to go to Ikea for dinner with Christine :)

We took a bus there but missed our stop and ended up at a place that looked like malaysia or something. After a long while we managed to find our way there yay thank God for technology and smartphones

Got poached salmon for dinner while they had pasta and potatoes and we shared chicken wings. Ikea food standard has really dropped. The food used to be so much nicer :(

Then christine left and while waiting for T's parents, we went to walk around and had ice-cream too!

So tired rn. Going out to study tmr. CAs in the next two weeks. Can't wait for them to be over!

Next post shall have photos of my taiwan trip with my family last december because I just realised I didn't really blog about it haha

I'll throw my arms around you darling, and we'll turn to ashes

My new favourite song is Save it for the bedroom by You me at six.

I think it's beautiful musically. So pop punk. But it's about sex which is kinda weird since it's such a happy cheerful innocent-sounding song um

Am I the only one who is tired everyday? :(

Chem test first thing in the morning which was really screwed up, gonna get a U for sure this time.

At least gp was cancelled and my gp group sat together to do our essay outlines but we ended up digressing and talking about prom and lots of other stuff

And dominic kept repeating that he can't imagine me in a gown and then proceeded to make fun of my boobs size #what

I don't really get the meaning of prom anyways, like it seems really cool and fun in all those american movies but in singapore feels more like I'd be going to get judged and to judge ha ha

And they were talking about booking a hotel room and getting wasted after prom and me and Lum were just sitting there going "why cant we have a chalet and a barbeque I want to barbeque" haha

Really though. I think it's much more fun if I were to drink with a few close friends than with a lot of people.

Reminds me of when me and the girls were sitting in a room in Hard Rock hotel gambling and having breezers aw how I wish I could rewind.

Ok need to shower I'm smelly

Our footprints washed away from the docks downtown

Great friday night spent with L and T :) met with L first at dhoby then travelled to somerset and T was an hour late tsk tsk. Took forever to decide where to eat, finally went to Pastamania. My meatball spaghetti wasn't very nice

Then had Cold Stone ice-cream at Orchard Central, and we got legal Lianne to buy vodka and orange juice at 7/11 hahaha then went to the open space at 2nd floor Scape. It was my first time trying vodka and it was quite... meh. Idk why but there was no alcohol taste, only the aftertaste of it. Maybe we added too much orange juice or something.

Eyes are gonna close. Must be the alcohol kicking in

Hold my heart, it's beating for you anyway

1. Have gotten emotionally attached to my black sneakers with the purple laces and even though they have holes in them that I can stick my fingers in, I can't bear to throw them away :( they're so comfy and warm and homely oh my I feel like a six-year-old with an old pillow

2. Baybeats are the three days right before my SA2s which sucks like hell. Both are so, so important omg I have no idea whether to go or not -cries- asked my tutor who said no and there's no point asking my mom or dad since obviously.

AHHHHH but DBHB and Monsters In Living Flesh and Mannequin are all performing on the first day of the festival so maybeeeee I can just go for the first day...? AHHHHH I dont know

3. Just had 3 cookies because I was mad hungry and can't decide if I should brush my teeth now (hahaha sorry gross moment)

4. Craving for ramen!!! May be partly because I saw Gerard's tweets about craving for ramen and it made me crave too

5. Friday tomorrow woohoo can finally lax a bit. Week passed really quickly. Nothing really interesting happened. Oh i accidentally saw my classmate in his underwear on tuesday. #awk. And only reason I'm blogging about this is so I can read my archives later in the future and laugh about it

6. Eyes are already half-shut ok good night

You be the anchor

Crying doesn't solve anything but it sure does make you feel better.

And we can listen to glass hearts shattering

1. Just gave up on my gp aq

2. Super tired (when am i not? sometimes I think I sleep too much)

3. Monday tomorrow just kill me noww

4. -insert whining here about how I just want to stay at home the entire week-

5. Super unproductive day today cause I studied with Jiams instead of alone like usual and I only did my econs homework gah

6. I think 2.4 is this week NOO ok but at least after this week we can just play games oh please let this week pass really quickly

7. On the other hand, no. Because CAs are in 2 weeks and I haven't touched anything

8. I need sleep

Southern constellations

Hiiiiii halfway through the week yay that was fast. I think that's a sign that I'm not stressed or that angsty because usually when I am, the week seems to crawl by.

In a random mood to blog today. Currently sitting at CBTL studying with a $7.40 cup of diabetes. Actually I didn't bring out a lot of work so I can't study that much outside today.

I've been meeting my mom a lot for dinner nowadays. Usually I go out to study after school or stay in school so I have dinner outside with my friends and anyway my family doesn't cook on weekdays anyway. Unhealthy right.

Sometimes I'm really scared that when I'm old I'll balloon up and suddenly get really really large because I always get hungry so I'm always eating, and I don't get cold easily so maybe I'm secretly fat hahaha. In fact in the mornings before the first break, even though I never ever skip breakfast, sometimes I get so hungry I feel like puking. Which means food magically disappears from my stomach within two hours. That's way too fast...

K back to studying. I really can't wait till I don't have to go back to school anymore. I counted four more months of school ok I can survive this.

Isn't it sad that I'm not enjoying my last few months as a student? :( I'll probably miss the uniform and playing games during pe or something and some other school stuff after I graduate but well. For now I don't like skool

Oh yes and I'm not going to prom... Dunno if it's the right decision since that'll mean I won't ever have gone to prom in my life since I missed AHS '12 prom (but I was in taiwan with the girls which was probably/definitely way more fun so) but anyway I can imagine just feeling really awkward there and doing nothing but taking pictures and getting judged haha

I hope you know we'll never fall out of line

Bam

How was your week guys?

Mine was rough though I've had worse. Rough mainly thanks to getting back our pw results on thursday and realising I got a B. The feeling didn't quite sink in at first until at night when I called Lianne and we had a h2ht about our lives and yeah. I don't really wanna talk about it :(

Can't remember what I did on monday.

Studied at CBTL after school on Tuesday. Decided to try something different so I got an english breakfast iced tea latte oh my it was terrible. Waaaay too sweet. But what to do? I like studying there so it means I have to buy something even if I don't really want to

Had cca on wednesday. I think that was the second last time I'll get to mug all the way in cca. Friday was the last time. I'm gonna miss that so much :( It's nice to just sit there and mug with the air-con and the other few J2s who didn't join syc too. Soon it'll be back to sitting on a chair in an ensemble plucking a few notes on my classical guitar. Nooooooo I don't wannaaaa

Got the results on thursday. It made me really depressed, I actually wanted to cry but everyone was there and I didn't want to cause any drama and I hate having people comfort me so yeah I sucked it up. Studied with xuemin after school, then we had macs' for late dinner/supper. Talked about results and gossiped. Every day I thank God we went to the same school. She's an awesome friend :) Also it'd been a long time since I had fast food and it actually didn't really make me feel better haha hais so much for 'comfort' food #lame

After school on friday there was cca again and it was hilarious because Fleurette and I somehow weren't really in the mood for studying that day and we started entertaining ourselves. It started off with us talking about how laughing is beneficial for health I think, and ended off with us having a smiling competition (Jacqueline joining in half-heartedly after we refused to stop pestering her) and we were lol-ing so hard. I feel kinda sorry now cause I think we were being a nuisance to the juniors practicing in front but I was having way too much fun at the time to care hahahhaa I laughed so much my cheeks and abs and throat ached.

Performed a song with bryan and jeromy around the end of cca, it was really awk (for me at least) because I think they thought all the groups had performed already and no one really knew the three of us were performing so the mini concert unofficially ended and then the guys just set up by themselves and self-invited themselves to the front of the room hahahha

It was my first time singing solo in front of an audience. I'm really really grateful that my ears didn't turn red like they always do when I'm embarrassed (or when the weather is hot). Was shaking a little but it turned out fine I guess, like I didn't screw up, I just felt really awkward throughout ha ha

Oh yes we did the Ballad of Mona Lisa by Panic! at the Disco which was a good song choice because a lot of people didn't look like they knew the song yay

Chionged after cca to meet Jiams but was still late so I had to treat her to ice-cream like we agreed earlier damnnnnn. Went to Raffles City because it has the nearest Ben & Jerry's outlet and they're having a 1-for-1 promotion till the end of May I think.

Had Thai Express for dinner. I always wish I could order the tom yum soup because I really like it but I know I can never finish the entire bowl by myself thanks to my very low tolerance for spicy food, and wums always orders it so I just sneak a few spoonfuls from her bowl heh heh

B&J's for dessert, we both decided to be boring and got Cookies & Cream! It was good of course. I love love love ice-cream.

Today I played ball in the morning with the usual basketball buddies. Three matches like always, and all were really close, like the last one was 11-10 (we won!) I always feel like a burden though because I'm terrible at shooting haha sigh

Mugged at the airport after that and happened to meet Lum and her friend Toonywoony haha. Also saw quite a few other people I know, all acquaintances. Why is this country so tiny :(

Well anyway I have to sleep. It's monday tomorrow, damn. I hope this week will be better. Please let it better. Oh another thing to be sad about. Spring fever tour just kicked off, and four of my favourite bands are touring together and judging from their tweets, quickly becoming best friends. They're playing tour pranks on one another and borrowing video games and crashing tour buses and camwhoring together and I'm... just sitting there.

But well I musn't complain. I will be eternally grateful for the fact that I saw both All Time Low and Pierce The Veil live. Two of the best nights of my life. So yep. YAY

Oh and I guess one small good thing about this week is I got the highest rank points in class for SA1 which is pretty much a joke because 42 rp isn't going to get me anywhere haha especially not to the course of my choice but the good thing is I won't have to worry that much about the parents-teacher meeting next saturday.

And on a random side-note, I miss writing. Like both writing fiction and writing songs. Wish I could just spend a day lazing around carelessly with coffee or tea and paper and pen and my guitar or piano :(

K I really have to sleep now. Have a good week everyone!

BYE

Trust me

I thought I was over it and then I listened to Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge and it made my heart hurt real bad.

You may say that I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one

(THIS POST WAS MEANT TO BE PUBLISHED ON MONDAY APRIL 1ST)

Ending the long break with class outing was awesome :)

At first I was a little apprehensive about going because my good friend Lum wasn't and I kinda imagined that the guys would just stick together or something haha but it was great! Got to know our new classmates Elysia and Zhiyong so much better and talked more to the people in class I usually don't talk to haha not that I'm unfriendly but there just isn't chance

We played ball games and frisbee and some eating game which was weird haha and when we were tired we sat down and played hand games and laughed till my throat was sore.

When we left we walked for agesssss to find the way out, I think someone was going the wrong way or something and everyone was just following and walking haha

I think we walked for about 3km just to get to the bus stop. Dunno how I'm gonna survive my 2.4 tmr ugh I hate running :(

Had dinner at a chinese food place in Bedok Point which was meh. Instant noodles and chicken chop for 8.90. Actually 10.80 including the iced water, GST and service charge

Can't believe there's school tmr. It's been more than 2 whole weeks since we had proper lessons. I feel really unused to the routine now.

I'm so tired I'm gonna crash now

I wanna watch the way you take the stage by storm

Good morning everyone. Rather cloudy skies today. Woke up at 9am instead of my usual 8am cause I had a latte at 9pm. Totally regretted it after I came home and felt as energized as a bunny until 2am.

Yesterday was gr8 after cca I took a bus to Siglap and watched wums eat then we went to have Udders. I got Horlicks Balls which was quite meh to me haha should've gotten the Snickers Honeycomb something instead. Or just be boring again and choose Cookies n Cream

Met Lianne at Tampines at 9pm and we went to JCo where I satisfied my coffee craving on impulse 😔 Tania came around 10pm and we went to mcCafe where she got a drink and we chatted. Haven't seen the two of them together in forever, I wish our schedules didn't clash so much :(

Missed them! Sigh

This week passed really slowly for me. Not a very good week.

Got all my SA results except Econs and GP. I'm going to flunk Econs anyway.

H2 math: C
H2 chem: S
H1 physics: S

I thought I would at least pass chem ugh I studied so hard for an S? How can you do this to me

Grades aren't the only thing that was bad about this week too but nvm

On a random note, it's April already omg. I don't know if it's a good or bad thing that time's flying so quickly.

So since I was waiting for the caffeine to wear off last night, I had a random thought and decided to count the number of close friends I have from my contacts list, and I got 6.

I don't really know what defines a close friend, I just went by the feels. Though when I was scrolling through I would stop at a particular name here and there and contemplate... And I asked myself things like, would I go out with this person alone? Can we have fun when we're together but also have deep conversations sometimes? Can I trust them?

So I guess that's my own criteria for a close friend. Interesting ain't it. Go count yours :)

And no I'm not divulging any of the six names haha you can go guess yourself if you're so nosey wosey

Last thing before I go have lunch.

I know I haven't really blogged about this yet, I've been wanting to but I just don't really feel like bringing it up.

MCR broke up on March 23rd. I didn't see it coming at all and that day was a huge whirlwind of emotions for me but well I've calmed down and kind of accepted it, and if that's what makes them happy then I'm happy for them too.

I think if I'm not wrong, in my last post before they broke up I talked about how I was no longer as obsessed with them. But no matter what they were still my favourite band for three years and it hurt a lot. I always believed that they were going to be a band and make music for a really long time.

I've noticed that Gerard seems to be a lot happier after the break-up though so I'm glad. They were such an amazing band. My one regret is that I never got to see them live, and I never will.