So maybe if we never wake up we can see the sky

OP IS OVERRRRR.

Left with I&R, and I submitted my first draft yesterday at about 11am yayyy.

On wednesday, I was so nervous I thought I was gonna run out! Haha ok a bit of an exaggeration but yeah. It ran pretty smoothly for my group! Q&A was a bit messy but I hope we do well :) Zr said he thought my Q&A answer was the best out of five of us aww.

But personally, I was completely stumped when my question was read out. Like what kind of a question is "What is the most significant aspect of your topic"?!

So when I said "Can you give me a minute?" I wasn't thinking about how to organise my answer, I was just completely panicking inside haha.

After OP was over my group stepped out and we were all like YAYYY haha

And we decided to be naughty and go kachiao the deaf group haha now that I think about it, it was actually pretty mean of us to go disturb them when we knew their OP was the next day, oops

We stepped into B211 with stony faces (I even slammed the door for effect HAHA) and the deaf group asked, "How was it?" and we just shook our heads and mumbled 'not good' and things like that.

Then shijia went to a corner because she was about to laugh -facepalm- and finally someone said "just joking" and we all went crazy.

Me, lum and shijia flung our cue cards in the air and screamed and ran around hahaha goshh. Divika later said that she got a shock when we did that LOL. We also shredded up our cue cards and random pw stuff that Huiyi found in her bag haha. It really felt good tearing up those things, although now I feel bad for wasting paper

Then we hung around there until Ms wong came in to tutor them and chased us away.

Me, lum and sj went home to bathe and change, then we met for dinner at ikea! The food there really sucks now. I gave the salmon a try because the pasta I ate the previous time was gross, and even that was... meh. My dad can cook way better than that! Haha

Even the meatballs are substandard now. Should've just eaten a hotdog and ice-cream for dinner.

We walked around ikea :) took a lot of pictures and some funny videos which I might post later if I'm not feeling lazy.

Yesterday, I spent my morning doing my I&R, then lunched with my mom, and went home and bathed before going to meet Lum, Shijia, Khaliesah, Xinyi, Swieyang, Divika and Yunting to catch Skyfall! Xinyi and Swieyang watched Pitch Perfect instead, I didn't know :(

Would've gone to watch that with them instead!

Anyway Skyfall was not bad. Not really that impressive, but at least it was only $6. A lot of the scenes were pretty cliched. No spoilers here :)

Then me, Lum and Sj went to City Plaza to shop~ the clothes were ok. Saw a few that I liked but none that I really wanted to buy. Bought a pair of shorts!

I still want that sweater I saw at a shop in T3 :(( but it's like $50! Though the material feels good.

Pictures from wednesday below, excluding the ones from ikea because they all get jumbled up ugh.

BYE

~

Imagine living like a king someday

This Pierce The Veil phase is lasting a lot longer than I thought it would ahaha.

So today is my OP day. I get butterflies in my tummy everytime I think about it. Doesn't help that I'm the first speaker. I need to remember to speak slower and smile more and remember that 'gestures' is pronounced 'jest-churs' and not the way it looks.

Sooo nervous.

On a completely unrelated note, I am completely in love with that part in Bulls In The Bronx where Vic screams "murder the moment" hahaha.

Ok back to the topic. It's 9.41am right now and I'll have to be in school by 10.30am with muggers united and we will practice till 12.30pm where we'll have a briefing, then our real thing will about 2pm I think. Then after that I'm gonna go have a mini celebration with my girls hehe.

Then tomorrow till sunday I'll be chionging I&R, which is due monday. And then BOOOOM PW WILL BE OVER.

Unbelievable how fast this year has gone by. I know everybody says that, but really. It's just crazy.

Before you know it, it'll be christmas. My favourite festive season EVER. And gosh, how I dread chinese new year. I really do hate it. Ughhhh.

And then next year will be a tidal wave. I'm so scared :'(

I'd blog somemore but I think I'm going to be late for our 10.30am meeting haha

BYE

~

Can we create something beautiful and destroy it?

Been feeling extremely tired recently. It's like by 9pm I am ready to conk out already. Apparently I'm not the only one, Huiyi and Shijia have been experiencing the same thing :/

Maybe it's because we've all been sitting in front of a computer for hours these days, unlike those times when we were having the lecture-tutorial routine and it was just having to stare at a whiteboard.

Today I woke up at 7.50am and lay there in bed for a few seconds feeling like it was a saturday.

The exact thoughts that were running through my head: morning sky's so pretty... what shall I do today? hmm just a few minutes more of sleep... wait, is today really a sat- HOLY SHIT WHAT TIME IS IT

Perfect sitcom material. Unfortunately, that was real life :/

And I somehow managed to fly around the house and get ready in 15min , all the while mentally cursing myself for not making sure my alarm was working on the morning of my OP dry run.

I reached school around 8.30am, and thank God the side gate was open so I didn't have to make one big round to enter by the main gate.

The morning was spent going through our presentation with ms wong over and over again, and anxiously rehearsing our scripts. It's kinda funny seeing people walk around school talking to themselves with cue cards in their hands.

During break we gave the new stall another try but their food is still... meh.

Then we had OP briefing, and finally the dry run. I didn't realise how pressurising it is to be the first speaker until we actually began :/

Ms. Khaliesah was our dry run examiner, she was actually pretty lenient. I LOL-ed in the middle of the presentation when she unexpectedly turned to ms wong who was chewing mentos and asked "Can I have one?" hahaha ok it doesn't sound funny but it was at that time when the atmosphere was so tense

After dry run it actually felt as though the real thing was over hahaha I felt so high! Then we went to comlab, the guys left, and me, Huiyi and Sj recorded ourselves singing this japanese love song hahaha

Then we loitered around tamp1 and I got barcook buns and unknowingly ate 3. I thought I ate 2 until huiyi told me haha. The mushroom bun is great! But it was quite a fail bun because the bottom of it was too thin and all the yummy soup-like mushroom thing kept dripping out eurgh :(

Homed, then lazed around till now. I'm starting to kinda miss the lecture-tutorial routine haha although I know when it's back in place again I probably won't.

I also miss my bestie, miss us being desk partners and constantly annoying him. Stupz ali!! I pray for a miracle, that he gets to promote :'(

K off to find food. I regret not going grocery shopping for milk and my favourite cereal earlier.

BYE

~

Sing a song for California

1. I always wish I learnt how to cook. It's one of two things I've always felt like I'm completely hopeless at (the other is dancing). I'm always eating but I am terrible in the kitchen heh. Even during those times in sec4 when T, L and I would cook at T's house, it was more like T and L would do all the cooking and I would just be standing there passing them things, chopping something or getting distracted and randomly breaking out into song.

2. Sometimes, it feels like I'm holding on to too many things at once, and I know I have to let some go but I can't, and I try and clutch onto something that's already vanished into thin air. It's a really horrible feeling, and it scares me how easily they disappear. :( I know you don't understand what I'm talking about haha nevermind.

3. Not feeling very good now because I was reading Band On The Run by chooseitwisely on wattpad, and whoaaa, it is way too intense. It's the sequel to Just What I Needed, which is basically about this girl called Keely Staub who becomes a rock singer and falls for her producer Seth Vaughn. It's a pretty sweet story so I was not expecting the sequel to be this depressing at all :( it's like a 'seven years down the road' kinda thing, and a lot of shit happened during that time which involved drugs, a terrible band breakup and Keely becoming a changed person omgahhh I felt so heartbroken for Keely, and I'm only at chapter 5.

Things look really really screwed-up and I have no idea how chooseitwisely is going to bring Seth back into the picture (I'm saying it like that because I trust that she will, if she doesn't I am going to be so so mad) so yeah :( the stories I read on wattpad really affect me a lot! Especially this one since I know leading lives like Keely's and Seth's are commonplace for a lot of musicians so it's not all completely fiction.

4. If you haven't already seen my tweets, My Chemical Romance is back (haha ok you can roll your eyes and skip to the next point it's ok) with a new album called Conventional Weapons which will be 'released' two songs at a time. The releases will span from this month to february next year, two for every month.

It's painful news for me and, I believe, hordes and hordes of other MCR fans, because I desperately want a full-album copy, not a max of two songs at a go PLUS in vinyl which I know is expensive, are they trying to kill us or something?

But anyway, the first two tracks have been released. They're called Tomorrow's Money and Boy Division. Going to be really honest here and say I think they sound too... normal. I love this band to bits (lost count how many times I've said something like that) and all they've ever produced was briliance so I'm slightly disappointed with the new songs this time.

It was the exact same feeling I got as when I first listened to Danger Days; disappointment, and feeling like they could've done better. Maybe I'm just setting my expectations too high, but I feel like a band that produced out-of-this-world albums like Three Cheers and The Black Parade is surely capable of more.

Plus they said the new album would be a mix of Danger Days and Three Cheers, but I feel like the new songs are more like Danger Days than Three Cheers. Oh well, we'll see about the rest. Can't judge just yet. And who knows, maybe the songs will grow on me :)

5. Today was spent rotting away :/ I took my Ernest Hemingway to starbucks with me after lunch thinking I'd spend the afternoon there, but the book turned out kind of difficult to understand. There were random french words, and all these names of places in Paris, though I don't know why I'm so surprised seeing as the book is supposed to be about Hemingway's time in Paris haha. The way the book is written is pretty interesting though, Hemingway really has a way with words. No wonder he's one of the most acclaimed literary writers of his generation.

6. So I left starbucks early, and brought my half-drunk mocha frap home with me. It was wayyyy too sweet. Gah. So I added a load of my favourite Greenfield milk to it at home. Tasted so much better after that.

7. I got Collide With The Sky already :) I also decided to do a little math, and it turns out I have spent at least $300 on band merch. Albums, t-shirts, badges. My gawwwd. 300 bucks! That's scary hahaha.

8. My favourite song right now is probably Disasterology by Pierce The Veil.

9. I have an OP script to re-write. :(

10. Should I continue reading Band On The Run? Ok I think I'm going to. Hopefully Seth comes back soon and their relationship becomes less screwed-up pleaseplease I want them to end up together!! :(

BYE

~

How does it feel like? Well, it feels like fire

I kissed the scars on her skin
I still think you're beautiful and I don't ever wanna lose my best friend
I screamed out, God, you vulture
Bring her back or take me with her


Currently on the train to somerset buy Collide With The Sky!!! It was an extremely impromptu decision, initially I was on my way home from tampines after me and Shijia were window-shopping there when our OP training in school ended.

Then as I neared simei I was thinking, so I'll be going home and then deciding whether or not to go to somerset for my album or to go to the starbucks at simei with my Ernest Hemingway novel, then like.

But I really wanna get my albummm. And I thought, well I'm on the train going in town direction, so why not? Haha.

So I'm listening to Collide With The Sky now as I'm travelling to get Collide With The Sky.

Still in my uniform but it's comfortable anyway even though the weather has been terribleeee. Feels like Battery City already.

BYE

~

There's a story at the bottom of this bottle and I'm the pen

Just gonna get straight to the point haha. My results:

Econs: C
Chem: C
Math: E
Physics: B
GP: B

Today was pretty much a rollercoaster ride. The night before, my pw group was talking on whatsapp and Shijia was saying: "a lot of people are gonna cry." and Huiyi replied with "I bring tissue" HAHAH

And this girl seriously brought three packets of tissue (Shijia and I happened to ransack her bag this morning) and even gave one to Zongren before we got back our econs paper LOLOL.

The first paper we got back was math. It was seriously a mood-downer, I was pretty depressed for a while after that. I expected a lot better especially after all the hard work I put in mugging for math.

Was entertaining all sorts of negative thoughts like maybe I'm just not smart enough because I tried my best and this is what I got, and was also dreaming about quitting and going to poly because poly kids seem to be having it so much easier than we are.

I was also upset with my C for chem because I expected at least a B, and 30% of the cohort got As and Bs, which means I'm not in the top 30% of the cohort UGH :( plus chem is the only subject I have tuition for. Damnit.

Got our physics paper after the break, was content with my B I guess. Huiyi got an A!!! Smart girl!! Proud of her 😘 It was hilarious, when she received her paper she actually screamed and started jumping around and yelling in the lecture theatre, not exaggerating at all HAHA

I'm probably the happiest with my B for GP, because I was not expecting it at all! The compre was sooo tough but I managed it even though I got one mark for my aq LOL and I was so sure I was gonna flunk my essay like I did for all the class practice essays our gp tutor has been giving us. Thankful for ms. khaliesah, she really is a good tutor.

Econs was average, I'm sad that I failed my case study section though :(

There's a few things I'd like to say to my class 12S16, even though I know you guys probably don't read my blog, but then it makes me feel more at ease typing all this haha.

Each and every one of you is an amazing person, not flawless, but awesome nonetheless. You're generally a lovely bunch of people, kind, friendly and very willing to help, that's what I love about this class.

What you need to know is that grades do not determine the places you go in life. As much as we have been brainwashed into believing so, it is most certaintly not true.

It's clear how you all work hard towards achieving better results, and even if you didn't get the kind of results you aimed for this time, please don't give up, don't be discouraged.

The scores are not finalised, so it's not over yet. Plus even if you didn't manage to promote, think of it as another chance to work even harder. In fact, given the extra one year, I'm sure you can do even better than some of your peers who only have two years to cram in everything they've learnt.

Take the opportunity to revise everything you've learnt this year and build up a good foundation before you move on.

Character is just as important as academics. You can have the most brilliant mind out of anyone else you know, but if you're an asshole, no one's going to want to mix around with you.

People may pretend to like you, but they don't, and you'll wind up having no friends, going through a lot of conflict, and in the end you'll just be unhappy.

So be proud of who you are. Don't give up on yourself because of your promo grades; work harder, because it is the getting there that matters.

~

I heard the train shake the windows, you screamed over the sound

If I were you, I'd put that away
See you're just wasted
And thinking about the past again
Darling, you'll be okay

And she said
"If you were me, you'd do the same
Cause I can't take anymore
I'll draw the shades and close the door
Everything's not alright
And I would rather."


Currently going through a Pierce The Veil phase. What an amazing band

Yesterday was another pw day again. After school me and Shijia went to roam around tamp1 and it was so funny hahahah halfway down the escalator after coming out from Daiso she suddenly gasped really loud and turned to me horrified

And she was holding up some body scrub thing that we were looking at earlier but she decided not to get it in the end HAHAHA and she forgot that she was holding it and just walked out.

I laughing till my tummy ached HAHAHA and she kept telling me to stop it all the way back as we went back up to quietly put the thing back at Daiso LOL.

We also got gongcha before that. We wanted to try something new so we both got gongcha alisan tea or something like that. Gahhhhh next time I'm just sticking to the same old milk tea with herbal jelly or earl grey milk tea that I always buy.

It was yucky :( it tasted like cold chinese tea, and I'm definitely not a fan of the salty milk layer they put at the top.

I'm so glad tamp1 has a few proper shops haha so us East-side kids don't have to feel that deprived anymore.

Oh and I saw this really really nice long-sleeved top at Topshop! (picture below) But it's like $69 damnit :( I was gonna console myself by saying ah it's prolly too thick to wear in singapore anyway, then I touched the material and was like, shit it's pretty thin.

And it's good for wearing to the airport or something next year too to study :'( oh well.

We went home after that and I made a video for me and Shijia's impromptu cover of Price Tag using pictures of us :) it's on my youtube channel now soooo. If you know it please go view it heh heh. I'm still considering if I should let people know my youtube channel hmmm.

Dinner was with Jiams wums at Ikea. We went around testing beds and bouncing up and down on them and took a couple of lame videos of ourselves and got glared at by a few random people :'( We also stalked a random young malay couple around Ikea, it was fun although we lost them three times and gave up trying to find them the third time.

Truly the epitome of 吃饱没事做.

Today is such a wasted day :( in my previous post I mentioned wanting to go all out the remaining few days before Judgement Day, but it's 3pm on a saturday afternoon and I'm just wasting away at home.

Actually, I asked L out earlier but cancelled because I had a stomachache and momentarily lost the mood to go out and the sky was dark and I thought it was gonna rain but It's all sunny and birds-chirping now -__-

Ohwell. Off to play guitar

BYE

~

They can take all of me, but they won't ever take what I still believe

I just randomly remembered those few frantic days after results day when Lynchua and I were calling each other and anxiously debating over whether to go to tpjc or to pursue creative writing in sp.

And we both wanted so badly to go to the same school and were weighing ll the pros and cons of jc and poly and I still remember her telling me on the phone, "I'm scared! Everyone in poly has like 365 sets of clothes, and then there's me!"

Hahaha it was so funny. And even though we didn't pick the same school in the end, I know it's all still good because we're both happy with where we are right now. Lynchua, if you're reading this, I hope you know that I miss you lots!! :(

I'm so jelly though, it looks as though everyone in poly is having way more fun and even doing way better in academics than us jc kids are. All my friends in poly are doing well, and it doesn't help that most of them are taking courses that I wanted to enter, like mass comm and creative writing :(

I know I prolly sound like a geek ahaha but honestly, my passion for writing is second to none but music. If I don't go into music or writing in the future, I really, really don't know what I'd become. Would most likely end up a wastrel haha.

So anyway. How's life? The past two weeks since promos ended have been spent mainly chionging pw and catching up with friends.

Everyone hates pw, it seems, but I'm actually quite fine with it. It's better than being stuck in a classroom, right? I'm just nervous for OP, since OP is all about the way you carry yourself, the way you speak and your level of confidence. Kinda scary!

On a side note, I'm really, really glad that I've been blessed with a pw group as hardworking and cooperative as mine. Sometimes I even feel like a bit of slacker in the group hahah.

And also, I'm really, really happy that my favourite girls are in the same pw group as I. Each group in 12S16 has 5 members- 3 girls and 2 guys, and it just so happened that I was lucky enough to get both of my minions in my group!! Sigh <3

Today's was a little slack, my group left around 2.30pm and I went home and had a kaya waffle and chocolate milk yummm. Simple pleasures in life! Then I watched Wild Child :)

I think I can safely conclude that Alex Pettyfer really isn't much of an actor, although he is very pretty. And Emma Roberts is gorgeous sigh. She rocked being both a blonde and a brunette! I bet she could easily pull off red hair and black hair as well.

Andandand I cried like a baby when her dad came and saw her playing lacrosse in the end :') I always cry at that part!

I love chick flicks haha. I want to re-watch Prom, A Cinderella Story, John Tucker Must Die and It's A Boy Girl Thing as well but funshion doesn't have any of those, aw.

Alright off to find another movie to watch heh heh. Today was a good day :) I am determined to enjoy myself as much as I can until our promo results get released on the 22nd!

BYE

~

I'd much rather have a quiet, withdrawn brother, or even a physically or mentally handicapped brother than a brother who is violent, who is bad-tempered and foul-mouthed, who spends beyond his means, who gives his parents' money to his fair-weather friends, who curses his parents and threatens to harm them.

But then again, God is fair. He's given me a healthy body, a strong mind, loving parents, amazing friends, a safe home, a stable life, and more than enough to eat and wear.

Maybe I should be content.

~

Don't stop if I fall, and don't look back

Listening to Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge and wondering how any album can be so perfect. Really. Words cannot describe my love for My Chemical Romance.

Kinda lazy to type everything I want to say and to link everything together, so here it goes in point form.

1. Did a couple of things I've been wanting to do post-promos. In fact, I have a post-promo list ahaha. I've written a bunch of lyrics on my cupboard, totals to about 40 songs. I spent two hours at night on it and when my mom came into my room in the morning she gasped and I thought I was in trouble and nervously asked, "Is it nice?" and she went "NICE!" hahaha

2. Sometimes I randomly get really really depressed and I don't even know why. Like October 3rd, which was the day before my math paper. It was terrible, I tell you. I woke up in the morning feeling completely fine but after that I went to study at a usual place at the airport and it was awful, I couldn't concentrate for no reason and I felt terrible and I had no appetite at all. I was really hungry but all I could stomach was an energy bar that I brought from home, and after that I just felt like puking. Gah. Then I decided I couldn't study anymore and took the train home instead. On the way back in the train my eyes started welling up and I just felt miserable and I think the guy opposite was giving me really weird looks. I wasn't even sick or anything. Man I hope I never have another day like that again :(

3. I feel unused to so much freedom all of a sudden, now that promos are over. But neither do I want to go back to studying just yet, like my mom keeps telling me to. I know two years will go by really quick but I feel like I'm running a race that will never end. Two years, and then what? This fear of the unknown is so annoying :/

4. There are a couple of old friends that I've been missing a lot lately and how I wish we could go back to the way things used to be, just me and you, coffee, laughter and late nights, but of course we can't. And what would be the point in trying to talk to you again? Because I know you aren't really there at all, that person that you once were is gone forever, and I don't recognise you anymore, I really don't. It makes me sad, wondering where that person went, and it's like a part of you died along with time, but at the same time I know there's no use moping about the past all the time, and we should look forward. So I'm over it.

5. Damn, I didn't mean for this post to turn out so bleak haha I'm sorry. I keep wanting to blog about a lot of things but I just forget everything the moment I start a new post D: Looking forward to this week though! Going out with my minions tomorrow! <3 an="an" and="and" exciting="exciting" going="going" i="i" jamming="jamming" lynchua="lynchua" m="m" most="most" nbsp="nbsp" out="out" p="p" post-promos="post-promos" probably="probably" tuesday="tuesday" wednesday="wednesday" week.="week." what="what" with="with" yayyy="yayyy">
I'm tired already, so I'm off to bed :)

BYE

~

I breathe you in with smoke in the backyard lights

This isn't fair, no don't you try to blame this on me
My love for you was bulletproof but you're the one who shot me


PROMOS ARE OVER YEEEEEEHA.

Well that was how I felt on friday actually. When the teacher said to stop writing, and he was going around collecting the scripts and me and Asyraf exchanged PROMOS-ARE-OVER grins hahaha.

I couldn't stop smiling the whole time the teacher was going around and I think everyone was judging me and prolly thinking I was damn confident about the paper haha but actually I was just crazily happy that promos were over.

It's kinda weird to think that promos just ended yesterday because I actually feel like I've been slacking for forever already and it's time to get back to work.

After physics the 12S16 girls went to have korean bbq buffet together :)) they treated me and shuxuan because it was our birth month aww. Thanks girls! :)

It was kind of not very worth it because I'm definitely more of a veggie than a meat person, but it was still good plus I had fun heh :) we also did a bit of shopping at tamp1.

How I've missed shopping without having to feel guilty about not using the time to mug.

After that I went to play ball with the melons and had a good dinner at mos burgers with them :D

Today was shopping at town with Et. We went to peninsula, where I decided not to buy anymore band tees because I realised I've been wearing way too much black :'( as much as I love band tees I don't always want to be wearing black and sometimes white.

I saw nice tops at New Look but they were exp :( and then we went to Far East Plaza and I bought a dress (whoa surprise) and two band badges (yay Pierce The Veil and another Mayday Parade!!)

Actually, post-promos, I've been feeling just plain tired. Like now. And lack of sleep is a cranky zoey, sooo.

Good night!

BYE

~

And now the red ones make me fly, and the blue ones help me fall

So it's twenty minutes till my birthday ends.

Just wanna say a big THANK YOU to everyone who wished me and made my seventeenth so special and I love you all so so so muchhh!! Sigh I love birthdays, they make me feel more loved than I already am HAHA

But really though. I was gonna list out everyone who wished me but I'm way too tired and I've tuition tomorrow at 8.30am sooooo.

Big hugs!!! To my family, my best friends, my classmates, my bandmates, everyone :)

Thanks to the people who wished me at midnight, especially my bestie Asyraf for the 28 messages hahaha

Thanks to my #MINIONS (Huiyi & Shijia) for lunching with me at Aston's and for staying with me all the way till 3.30pm awww I laughed so hard hahahah love you bbys!! ❤ Let's promote together and go lepak after promos!! :))) and thank you for your cards hehe!

Thanks to my bandmates Charles, Jeromy and Darren for the Hold Me Down album by You Me At Six omg I swear I've been wanting that album for forever! Probably one of the best birthday gifts ever :')

Thanks to my girls (Christine Emily Kairong Lianne Tania in alphabetical order) for the surprise and the cake at airport hahaha so sweet of you all!! And for staying around to camwhore with my phone ahaha and just for being there! <3

OMG and thanks to Christine for the All Time Low pictures (not posters but idk what you call it ah but you can paste them on your walls) although I will probably never ever tack up that picture of All Time Low in their undies, unless I move out and get my own house haha I LOVE YOU my musical bestie, it's really true that probably no one else I know loves music the same way I do, so glad that I found you! <3

Last but definitely not least, thank you to #MELONS (Jiams, Dt, Et) for the roses and the rooftop surprise (it was really a surprise man, I got a shock when someone suddenly hugged me from behind out of nowhere) and the fun dinner and the totally unexpected cake and the unnecessarily loud birthday song at Sushi Tei. I love you all!!! #MELON4LIFE

haha oops it's 12.00am already. (happy Wall's Day to Dt and Pam omg hahaha very very old inside joke)

So good luck to everyone who's still having promos (me sigh) and congrats to everyone who's done!!

I have about slightly more than two days to mug hard and then I can finally lax!!!

This year has been a really great year, and my seventeeth was amazing, thanks to all of you guys.

Off to bed! xoxo

BYE

~

This is just a little rant, some stuff to get off my chest that you readers may probably find dumb but anyway.

WHAT HAPPENED TO VARSITY FANCLUB MY GAWD I AM SO HEARTBROKEN AND DISTRAUGHT AND ANGRY AND UPSET.

I used to be a really huge fangirl of Varsity Fanclub, I loved them nearly as much as I used to love Ne-Yo because they were this five dorks that, I quote a Youtuber, would 'invade target and make a fool out of themselves'

And they made good teen pop music and were my favourite boyband ever but they were so obscure and no one I knew, knew who they were but it was okay because I loved them

And I, like most other fans, was upset when Thomas left but I still stayed true and I supported VFC when TC joined.

Then everything fell apart when Bobby left, and I suddenly realised VFC wasn't all that perfect after all, and there were sides in the group, and everyone was being nasty to one another, and it really broke us fans' hearts

When David left I wasn't really surprised because I knew it was coming, and he really made the right choice because look what VFC has become, what the heck is After Romeo what has happened to the five sweet boys who are Devin and Blake look at Drew getting on my nerves with all his cockiness

And how everything feels so fake in their latest promotional video and you can actually see the way Devin looks at Drew and you know he doesn't really like him

In short, I'm just happy for Thomas, Bobby and David because they look so much happier now, and I hope they're all good.

And I wish they didn't have to go on like that and try and keep up the facade, because it's ruined VFC's memory.

~

And as I start to run I stop to breathe

I'll be here by the ocean just waiting for proof that there's sunsets and silhouette dreams
While my sandcastles fall like the ashes of cigarettes and every wave dragged me to sea
I could stand here for hours just to ask God the question, is everyone here make-believe
With a tear in his voice he says, son that's the question
Does this deafening silence mean nothing to no one but me


2 papers down, 3 left to go. I'm so fed up with econs. At least science subjects aren't so dry; econs is basically just memorising chunks and chunks of information and regurgitating everything and applying to context in exams.

I really don't know how people can like arts subjects haha #justsaying

My dad is cooking both lunch and dinner so I've to stay home for both and there's tuition at night which basically means very little time for me to go out and mug.

Staying home to study is not an option; I can never ever concentrate at home.

Yesterday was pretty productive though, I went to the staff canteen at T2 and mugged about 5 or 6 hours from 2pm to 10pm, the rest was spent playing with my phone or eating. Tsk tsk.

Then I couldn't study anymore, my brain felt real saturated so I packed up and went to sit in front of the departure information board to people-watch.

After that I met up with a childhood friend to go home together. I haven't seen him in 10 years!

We met cause I decided to type in his name on facebook one day and I didn't expect to find anything but he was the very first search result and I recognised him instantly, he really hasn't changed at all omg, not just looks-wise but personality-wise too.

So anyway I fb-messaged him because I was so sure he would remember me but turns out he had a really bad memory and didn't at all hahaha awk.

But anyway we found out we both live in simei now and he was working at the airport saturday (which is yesterday) and I happened to be going there to study too so we met up after.

It's nice to know that there are people out there who really don't change much at all :')

Hahaha and the funny thing was he spoke in chinese a couple of times and I kept huh-ing because I felt so unused to speaking in chinese conversationally.

The only times I've spoken chinese to my friends were in primary school, and after that I don't know why either but none of my friends in AHS use chinese to converse, so it was English all the way, anyway I'm more comfortable speaking english.

In the past few years I think I've only spoken chinese to my chinese teachers or to my grandmother who sometimes comes over.

Of course I still use chinese, but just bits of it. Kinda worried that one day I may just forget how to read and write the language altogether.

Anyway whoa this was supposed to be a short post but it's turned into an essay haha lazing on my bed now.

Need to go mug econs sigh. Go zoey go! 5 more days and it'll all be over!

BYE

~

I was your chance to get out of this town

I've never told a lie
And that makes me a liar
I've never made a bet
But we gamble with desire
I've never lit a match
With intent to start a fire
But recently the flames are getting out of control

2 more days to promos and 10 more days till the end. Everything passes by so quickly.

Plans for today are pretty much the same as yesterday, the day before, the day before that... Mug.

I'm also going to school for a brief physics consultation, and then having tuition at night.

I decided to pick up my guitar recently again because I missed it too much, and now I'm playing every day, goshhh what a way to get distracted, good job zoey :(

Probably heading to starbucks later to do my mugging. TEN MORE DAYS.

I can't even remember the last time I've been to town, and that's a first. This feels a lot like 'O' levels.

Last but not least, good luck to everyone who's having their promos now, whichever school you're from! Let's all promote together! I hope none of my friends will have to undergo a three-year course, so best of luck bbys.

BYE

~

The papers say, Johnny won't you come back home?

Haven't updated in ages :(

Promos are in 6 days and the end of promos are in 14 days. By tomorrow it'll mean less than two weeks to the end of promos wow. Where does the time go?

I've been studying, but I don't know if it's good enough. I'm most worried for chemistry now even though it used to be my best subject. Organic chem is a bitch! :(

Yesterday I mugged the day away with Ali, and later Nat and Dom happened to come to the same bk and we all mugged together ahaha it was fun, though 'fun' shouldn't be the word for a mugging sesh.

Sometimes I feel random waves of anxiety for my promos, like holy shit what if I don't promote I'll just kill myself omg

And other days I feel way too chill :/ today is one of those 'chill' days. In fact I just spent the last 45 minutes playing guitar and playing with my phone.

I'm sooo hungry. Can't wait till my mom comes home with food. Forever hungry these days, idk why. My own appetite scares me.

Off to mug a bit before dinner.

BYE

~

We are the children of adelphia

Look at my guitar calluses :(((

I've always had kinda ugly fingers because my nails are unbelievably short, I have this terrible habit of playing with them and somehow 'peeling' off my nails, idk how to say it without sounding gross haha but anyway it doesn't hurt at all.

And now that I've started to play guitar my fingers just get uglier gahhh.

Oh well, oh well.

BYE

~

But in the darkest times you find out what you're made of

So my new favourite song is Follow My Voice by For All Sleeping. It's amaaaazing. Not just musically, but lyrically as well. When their screamer screams "I don't want to be the voice of a generation, I just want to be a voice for you" and I just about die.

Anyway promos are in 18 days :((( I'm worried! Can't wait for after promos and I can just rot away.

The past few days have been great, in fact I feel like I've enjoyed this short one week 'break' even though I've gone out to mug everyday except on the weekends I think.

Gonna spend the rest of my day mugging, I pray it's productive! :/ I can't wait for dinner though I just had lunch haha my dad's gonna cook spaghetti!

Ending off with pictures from wednesday's mugging sesh with Huiyi & Shijia at the airport :) love my mini class clique! <3

And I can't get the pictures to arrange in order tchhh so they're all jumbled up haha oh well.

BYE

~

Life

Life is when Gerard Way sings "I'm trying" in Demolition Lovers.

When Derek Sanders sings "Slow, so slow, I fell to the ground on my knees" in Terrible Things.

When Synyster Gates plays the ascending chromatics in the bridge of Dear God.

When Chris Wolstenholme plays the opening bass riff in Hysteria.

When Brian White switches from low scream to high scream in Too Little Too Late.

When Josh Franceschi sings "Just crash, fall down" in Crash.

When Oli Sykes screams "Everything I touch turns to stone" in Blessed With A Curse.

~

A little piece of heaven

Hello wello.

Currently in simei's Starbucks mugging alone! All my friends are mugging with their friends so that leaves just me having to study alone :'( but s'okay I don't mind :)

I even eat alone sometimes after school or something and T always makes fun of me for that chekkk.

My aim is to finish an entire econs book by today, which is 133 pages lolol. I'm currently at page 43 and it's 2.30pm and I have tuition at 8pm so that leaves me with about slightly more than 4 hours to study 90 pages hmmm.

I don't even know why I'm blogging. I just feel like typing.

Oh yes I probably shouldn't be doing this now but I'm looking for a drummer to join our band, anyone interested? :) you have to be interested in doing pop punk/post-hardcore/punk rock/some metalcore.

Preferably a female, between 15-19 years old. But if you're a dude it's fine too. I just want another girl in the band haha.

Soooooo back to mugging. 4 more weeks and all of this will be over and I can jam and shop and blog and write as much as I want yayyyyy

BYE

~